September 20, 2003: [•] Early this morning I came home from a long night of both work and play. As I laid down to go to sleep I had a number of realizations. It was like I awoke from the fantasy world that my life had become lately. I realized that many of things I thought I had that I did not. I realized that things were not what they seemed. I realized that things I said in French could never be real in English. It was like the return of my old self after a long hiatus in a far off place. It was like the return of flAnnelmAn. God, I missed myself.
Tag Archives: sleep
Classic DF – 9/16/03
September 16, 2003: [•] There is this certain feeling that you get when your life comes full circle. It is an unrelenting condition that is somewhere between peaceful content and absolute disappointment. When you find yourself exactly where you started out and with no gain after much work you can only let out a sigh. I’m sure you’ve been there too. That is where I am today. I’m not upset or angry. Then again I’m not overjoyed and full of satisfaction. I’m just in a medium lull waiting to get going again. It’s like being on a rollercoaster only to get stuck upside in the loop to loop. I guess all I can do now is tap my finger and wait for the ride to start again. Whenever “again” might be, well that’s an entire other bone to pick on and tonight I’m just too tired to even try to gnaw on it. It’s probably just better to sleep on this one. So I will.