Oct. 22, 1999: Everyone has an opinion and in the words of Rev. Daemon Immortalis, “That’s a beautiful thing”. However, sometimes if you can’t say something nice you shouldn’t say it at all. That’s from Mrs. Brigsby in the The Secret of Nimh. She was a smart mouse. Rock has shared his insights into Melissa and my posts about “friends”. I guess Rocky was right on that point, but sometimes being mute only leads to being taken advantage of. As was this case, I believe… I could be wrong (but I’m not so shut up for a second and keep reading:). The only life long friend I’ve ever had was my Mom… she has been there since she shot me out of her crotch 22 yrs. ago. Ummmmm… everyone else has been there less time. I guess that isn’t wasn’t what Rock meant exaclty… I think he was striving for the more proper term of “long time friend”. Well, I did choose my long time friend. Rock, I don’t want to hurt your feelings, but you won’t stay any longer with one person than the one you marry. That person will be the longest friend (and lover etc…) you’ll ever have. Your wife should be forever, at least that is what Mel and I are striving for. Anything less and you shouldn’t marry that person. So I did choose my long time friend and companion, Melissa. So what is it Rock was really talking about? I think what he was hoping to say was: Damn it flAn, why don’t you wait for them understand your marriage like you did for me?! Good point, I have an answer: 1.) When you love someone as deeply as I love Mel you defend that person from anyone who is out to hurt them… they were out to hurt her and Covalence was hoping to somehow steal back Mel… the reality check for him should have been she was never his and she hates his lame butt. But, that’s another point for another time. 2.) Covalence didn’t want to understand us… he wanted to destroy us. Why? I don’t know… maybe he has become the big drinker he was bragging to everyone he is… maybe he’s an alcoholic or something. The only help I could offer him is the advice to seek professional counseling and treatment in a good Betty Ford Clinic 🙂 He never supported our marriage not because it was too fast, but because he was jealous; case closed. That person isn’t a friend…. and Rock if you think that person is a friend: me and you need to discuss why you shouldn’t let people use you or hurt you, even if you think they are a friend… they are not. 3.) Who cares about their friends more than their wife… oh yeah, those divorced guys! Don’t be foolish sheeeeeeeesh!!! I can understand what he means though (and I say that without sarcasism). You think, Rock, that if I give those idiots a chance maybe then they’ll figure out that Mel and I followed our hearts… that’s why we didn’t wait and we spend so much time together, because we really love each other. I couldn’t agree more with you my friend EXCEPT Covalence isn’t going to accept that… he hates both of us because we are everything he wishes he was: married and happy. Jealousy will never allow friendship and hatred can never be ignored. So I give you this… we’ve given everyone a chance to understand us; it is them who refuse to understand and therefore never will. There is no reason to hold onto friends when they are long gone from the time you were friends. There is no reason to hope for change when they never will. And there is nothing to say when they won’t hear what you have to say. The deaf ear hears nothing. They have choosen their lives, and I have choosen mine. I am happy with my choice. Are they happy with theirs?